A generation ago, paternity leave was a foreign concept. Why would a father need new-baby leave when the majority of new mothers stayed home with infants? And don't even think about the notion of two fathers raising a child as a couple, back in the 1950s.
But now, new fathers in at least three states have access to partially paid paternity leave and some progressive employers offer two weeks or more of fully paid paternity leave. The growing number of same-sex couples raising families -- and single individuals adopting -- means you can not assume that every child has both a mother and a father.
Expectant fathers -- and their spouses, often working moms -- would do well to consider the options for taking time off after the birth or adoption of a child. Not only can it save you child care costs, you will have the priceless opportunity to bond with your new offspring immediately.
Paid Paternity Leave
In the U.S., a minority of new fathers will have access to paid paternity leave. But it's worth exploring whether your employer provides such a perk, since not every employee will be up-to-date on the package of benefits. Moreover, some of your colleagues who are new fathers and are eligible for paid paternity leave may decline to take it, whether for fear of setting back their careers or of the challenge of caring for an infant 24-7. (Both are myths, in my opinion, but that doesn't prevent people from believing them.)
So your first stop should be your employee manual. Read it cover to cover and make sure you understand the options available. You might also ask your human resources contact to help explain the package of family benefits, since sometimes parental leave falls under short-term disability or medical leave. Look at what other new fathers have done, although don't feel you have to follow their lead.
If you're a resident of California, New Jersey or Washington, you're in luck when it comes to paternity leave. California workers who contribute to the state disability fund may take up to six weeks of leave in a year, with 55 percent of their pay up to a threshold, in order to care for a new baby, among other reasons. In New Jersey, new fathers can replace 66 percent of their income for six weeks, according to the National Center for Children in Poverty. And Washington State's paid parental leave law offers five weeks of leave with $250 a week in pay.
Other Paid Leave
If you're like the majority of expectant fathers in the U.S., there's no paid paternity leave available to you. But don't despair. The next step is to look at your accrued paid sick leave, vacation time and personal days. You may be able to use this time off to bond with a new baby. (That's if you do have paid time off, in the first place.)
One important consideration is whether to take paternity leave and maternity leave at the same time, so the new family can enjoy those precious first weeks together. Or perhaps you'd prefer to take as much maternity leave as possible, and only after that has expired, to take paternity leave. The plus of that arrangement, of course, is the savings on child care expenses.
Just as when you plan maternity leave, you must crunch the numbers with paternity leave to decide whether the amount of pay -- if any -- will work for your family. It's important to be realistic about how much time off you can afford take without digging your family into a financial hole.
Unpaid Paternity Leave
If you're one of the millions of workers in America without any paid leave -- whether for illness or vacation -- there may be no choice but to take unpaid leave. Perhaps you've been saving up for the birth of your child, and you can dip into your savings to take a few days, or even a few weeks, without pay in order to care for your child and spouse.
Under the Family and Medical Leave Act, your employer must give you unpaid leave to care for a newborn or ill family member. Not all employers are covered by FMLA, so check the specifics before barging into the HR office demanding your time off. (In fact, never barge. Always ask nicely.)
Again, you'll want to consider whether to take unpaid paternity leave right after childbirth -- when the new mom is most in need of support and care. Or whether you'll stack maternity and paternity leave right after each other, to maximize baby's time with a parent. A key factor may be whether friends or family members are available to help in the immediate postpartum stage.
No matter what your decision, enjoy your new family! The role of father may feel new, but it's one that only you can play. Pretty soon, you'll forget what life was like before the baby arrived.
